February 29, 2008

The Nineties are calling and they want their rock stars back from the Oughties!

SOOOOooo when I was in Los Angeles back in January, Paul pulled out his old journals from the 90's and read them to me. Oh GAWD I was laughing so hard, I was nearly in tears. Anyway, so I decided he needed to type up some entries and e-mail them to me, so I could blog them. His journal was the blog of the 90's. And it was so ridiculous. Here is a little bit of my sordid past for your entertainment.! It's about a weekend when we traveled to NYC from LA.

Ok this is from my journal almost word for word. I will only leave out the parts that are boring but it is all true. I swear there will be more to come. This is the story I read to Joc the last time she was in Los Angeleez which inspired us to post stories from my brilliant journal. It's better than a movie. Joc can add pics and change names. This story is titled:

LET ME OFF THIS PLANE! I FORGOT THE CANNOLI'S!!!!!!!

Wednesday June 17th 1998:

MY BIRTHDAY! Whoopee. I packed in the morning. Mommy picked me up to go to the aero Puerto. I met Joc and drugstore Johnny at LAX. We got on the plane and immediately started drinking mimosas. Johnny gave me some great pill called a SOMA which put me in a great frame of mind. Joc and John slept for a long time. They sang happy birthday to me very loudly on the plane... twice. The flight attendant gave us a huge bag full of champagne and Heineken. Yae! John drank his in the cab on the way to the hotel in New York. We checked in and got ready. Hit the ground running! We got in a cab and drove to Clementine's. Oh ya, it was totally raining and lightning and thundering. Joc covered my eyes when we walked in and when I opened them there was Rob my best friend in the world who told me he wouldn't be able to come. (we were roommates in college and after college he moved back to nyc. Amazing person.) Joc had planned this surprise party for me and EVERYONE was there. Victoria, Rob, the beautiful Jimmy, Johnny of course, Lisa (another one of my friends from fashion school), and Lexxie (whoremouth). I was in total shock. I could barely speak. Joc got me Chanel Egoiste Platinum. Rob got me a gift certificate for Armani for 500 doll hairs. John gave me some pills! Perfect. We ate fabulous food and drank many martinis and Kir Royals. Went to this club called Systems in the village. We met some chick who might as well have been naked. She was wearing the Gucci thong bikini. Dancing, all that, you know. Met up with Michael James the club king of New York. He was still raving about the party we threw him last year in our hotel. (I'll tell you dear readers about that later). He took us to this underground club in the village at about 4:00 am. They were still serving there. It was hedonistic. Apparently they had slot machines there. 8:00 am back to our hotel. Lexxie (whoremouth) was in my bed. So I jumped on her and gave one of my famous drunken speeches till she left. To sleep. ZZZZZ,

Thursday June 18th, 1998:

Woke up bout 3:00pm. Saw New York with Rob all day. Back to the Hotel. Got dressed up cuz we had reservations at i Tre Merli. I had Penne a la Vodka of course. We booked it outta there and had a little trouble getting a cab so we let this gypsy cab pick us up. This was the most insane cab ride I've ever had. The guy was totally on speed or something. He drove like a madman. It was like Mr. Toad's Wild Ride. We almost got into five accidents. Anyway, we made it to Max Fish heart's pounding.

Sunday June 21st, 1998:

3:00pm we got up and took the train to Connecticut to visit Joc's family. Joc's Grammie picked us up at the station and drove us over to her house where we ate yummy food. Some guy named Vinnie came over with his girlfriend Jacquelyn (Joc's Cousin). The first thing I asked for was a scotch on the rocks. They asked me if I wanted some water with that. I said "no, I'll just let the ice melt." Joc's mom and dad and sister Lauren came over we all went back to their house. We sat around and chit chatted. Then we went on the "castle" tour of Greenwich Connecticut. The "castle" tour is just a beautiful drive by all the biggest most expensive houses in Greenwich. Many of which look like castles! At night we ran around catching fireflies to bring back to the hotel. I'm still amazed by those things. Me, Joc, Johnny, and our bugs got on the crowded train. Back to the hotel. Joc and Johnny went to sleep. Me and Rob went to a bar called Wax where we met some guy named Magic who was a magician. Go figure. He was hilarious. He did all these amazing card tricks for me. He made my dollar bill float in the air. It was such a mind scramble. Magic was happening in the Big Apple. Back to the hotel. The sun is coming up. I have to throw a sheet over Johnny's naked booty.

Monday June 22nd, 1998:

We sleep till 3:00pm. Then they force me to get up cuz the hotel is kicking us out. It's total chaos. We give our crap to the bellboy who holds on to it for us. Here comes the bill... It's only about $1600 Bucks. So we go to Little Italy to eat at some fabulous restaurant. I got some pesto which unfortunately I could not finish because of the incredibly explosive gas I've acquired on this trip from all the partying. Joc buys 15 cannoli's and it starts getting late so we go pick up our luggage and take a cab to the airport. The cabbie takes us on a long trip through Central Park. It's like a long, sad goodbye. I'm gonna miss this town. I have to live here sometime. Across the bridge I say goodbye to the center of the universe. Now at the airport there is a mad dash to catch the plane, which they are holding just for us. We had to take all of our luggage through the security gate because we are on stand-by and couldn't check them. In the frenzy Joc forgot her cannoli's which she sent through the X-ray machine. The plane is pretty much empty so we get our own row. After they had closed the doors Joc realized she had forgotten the cannoli's and starts screaming for them to let her off the plane. "LET ME OFF THIS PLANE! I FORGOT THE CANNOLI'S!" Of course this is impossible and the delectable treats, of which we each had only one in the cab, are gone.

We sleep for most of the flight home. There was this pathetic woman who was breaking up with her boyfriend on one of those plane phones. Obviously he had dumped her on the phone and she went into hysterics, crying and begging him not to dump her. She started to hyperventilate and it was going on for hours. It was really bothering the other passengers so a doctor on the plane calmed her down a bit and gave her a Valium. I think she continued sobbing quietly throughout the whole flight.

When we were landing in L.A. we all gathered at a window to watch. We flew over east L.A. and Inglewood. I think it was a little sad for me when we landed. I wanted to stay and stay and stay and stay.......

Some old pics I found:
Johnny Rotten & Paul on the plane:

At Clementine's:

In the streets:

I am SOOO looking forward to more of my "past calling"!

Ciao,

Jocelyn

February 29, 2008 01:02 AM

Comments

Posted by: Lauren at February 29, 2008 09:40 AM

Posted by: Alexis at February 29, 2008 12:41 PM

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